Freedom is often a big driver for people wanting to become a Founder. But speaking from my experience, it can be a challenging concept to adopt when you’ve only worked in a set corporate structure that you had little (or no) say in.

I use the term, ‘9-5 hangover’. You want to shift your mindset to feeling free and master of your own fate, but the habits and pressures of the 9-5 stick with you like a stubborn headache. I’d say it took me 4 years to fully shake my hangover.

If you put a co-founder in the mix as well, this triggers the learned mindset of ‘going above and beyond for the team’ and depending on your experience, the perception that we’re always competing with colleagues. It’s therefore totally understandable that toxic working patterns can emerge between you, so have compassion for yourself and the situation.

Did you and your co-founder ever lay out what you wanted your work-life balance to look like? And the hours you wanted to work? If you did, are you clear on what’s caused that to change?

Has this feeling been discussed between you? What’s holding you back from addressing it? 

The question, ‘how do we reset and establish the work-life balance… while still driving our business forward?” gives me the impression that you think creating balance could compromise business growth. Why might you think that? Do you have any evidence that belief is true? What if the business actually progresses more when there’s a better balance? Consider what personal beliefs are showing up here and how you could re-write them.

You also mention a pressure to achieve results for each other. Do you know why that is? I think the conversation around work-life balance will help, but there’s a couple of practical things I’d suggest:

• Have defined roles and responsibilities to give you more autonomy.

• Schedule routine catch ups, but outside those meetings, be independent and don’t feed the habit of consistently checking on each other (not about task updates anyway).

Your energy and co-founder dynamic have a direct impact on success of this business. So creating the working lifestyle and partnership you want aren’t just ‘nice to haves’, they’re critical. Because what’s the consequence of doing nothing here? How will being worn down enable you, your co-founder or your business to succeed?

You started this to be your own boss and work on your terms, SO DO THAT!

Discuss this with your co-founder with THAT energy. Bring a bucket load of positivity and creativity to map out how you create the balance and the business that will reallllyyyy allow you to thrive.

I’ll share some questions below to help. This is a powerful realisation and one that you can act on.