I assume this dynamic between you wasn’t always the case, so do you have ideas as to when and why it started?

Do you remember the first time your Co-Founder undermined you? What was happening? A certain business or life event, a broader context that influenced your partnership perhaps?

If something comes to mind, it might be a factor, it might not. But being curious and trying to understand why a situation has occurred can help ease feelings of anger as we build a bigger picture.

There’s then two routes to explore here:

1 - WHAT YOU CAN’T CONTROL

As much as we might like to, we can’t control what our Co-Founder says or does. We also can’t control what has already happened. 

So try to not put energy into thinking about what could’ve / should’ve happened. Accept it, and know your energy is better used for how YOU CHOOSE to respond. Our energy is a finite resource so put it to good use.

2 - WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL

That feeling of going around in circles only creates more anger as it feels like we’re stuck in a pattern. So how can you break that pattern?

You have a responsibility in this situation too. You’re present in those moments and play a part in the conversation, so how can you change it?

Think of the last time your business partner undermined you, how did you respond? How do you feel about your response? 

Map out how you want to respond in these situations for the best outcome. See it as a chance to master your thoughts and emotions and CHOOSE how you respond rather than react. It’s a powerful mindset shift.

I know you’ve tried to communicate this to your partner, but is there a way you could do that more constructively? Are these conversations being fuelled by anger rather than a desire to realign and reset as a team?

When we feel angered it can be tempting to respond with anger, especially if we feel like we’ve tried to communicate something but it’s been dismissed. But know that you have the power to break that pattern and respond however you choose. You’ve got this.